By Shahida Arabi, M.A., Author
“Many abused children cling to the hope that growing up will bring escape and freedom. But the personality formed in the environment of coercive control is not well adapted to adult life. The survivor is left with fundamental problems in basic trust, autonomy, and initiative. She approaches the task of early adulthood - establishing independence and intimacy - burdened by major impairments in self-care, in cognition and in memory, in identity, and in the capacity to form stable relationships. She is still a prisoner of her childhood; attempting to create a new life, she reencounters the trauma.”
– Judith Herman, Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence – from Domestic Violence to Political Terror
It is often said that one can become addicted to anything that can be used to numb emotional pain. Drugs, alcohol, food, gambling, and sex are all widely recognized for their addictive potential. Addiction to love and relationships, however, tends to be less well-recognized and understood.
Dr. Georgia Fourlas, LCSW, LISAC, CSAT
Clinical Director of Workshops, Rio Retreat Center at The Meadows
There is an undeniable link between childhood trauma and the ability to cope with adult trauma. Traumatic experiences seem to build upon one another, and not in a good way.
By Brenna Gonzales, MS, LPC, Rio Retreat Center at The Meadows Therapist
In our culture, we are taught that certain feelings are off limits. There is a general sense that if you’re not happy most of the time that you’re doing life wrong.
By Jill Vermeire, MFT, CSAT-S, Willow House at The Meadows Program Director
You might be a Love Addict if:
We are proud to announce the addition of Stefanie Carnes, Ph.D., to our team of Senior Fellows. Dr. Carnes will serve as the clinical architect for Willow House at The Meadows, a new program for women struggling with sex, love, and intimacy disorders that is set to open in March of 2017.
By Andrea Sauceda, Internet and Social Media Director at The Meadows
In these times of complex debates, high stress, and anxiety--when we're constantly reading the news and watching the news and thinking about the news and arguing about the news - it can be nice to take a break and get back to basics for a bit: Like, to the basics of human emotion and behavior.
By Caileigh Smith, MC, LAC
We often try to motivate ourselves through should statements:
“I should have done better.”
“I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I should only have one cookie.”
By Caileigh Smith, MC, LAC
Have you ever sent the wrong text message to the exact wrong person? I have. In fact, I did it recently. I sent a message about a person TO THAT person—the horror! The consequence? Well, besides being cut from that person’s Christmas card list, I suffered a complete and utter shame attack.
By Kevin McCauley, MD, Senior Fellow at The Meadows
I have this shocking statement I sometimes make in my lectures: “Heroin addicts are sweet people.”
I say this partly because I’m an addict myself and I tend to make hyperbolic statements for their emotional impact (not my best quality). But I also do it to push back against the tired trope that addiction can be reduced to a personality disorder. This is what I learned in medical school: put bluntly, addicts are sociopaths.