The Meadows Blog

Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, PhD will be speaking at The Meadows Free Lecture on April 7, 2011, at 7:00 pm at the Winnetka Community House in Winnetka, Illinois. Dr. Fife will discuss Developing Solid Boundaries and Self Esteem: The Foundation of Healthier, Happier Relationships. The presentation will address the ways that poor self-esteem (whether it is expressed through shame or feelings of superiority) and impaired boundary systems (e.g. the inability to set limits, or the tendency to wall off emotionally) affect the dynamics of our relationships, how to recognize these unhealthy dynamics between you and significant others, and also how to improve self-esteem and develop healthier boundaries in your relationships. Dr Finlayson-Fife will give you tools to help you track what it is you are doing in your relationship, to understand it's negative impact on you and others, and to know how to correct it in order to make your interactions healthier.

Contact Jenna Pastore at 815-641-2185 for more information. No registration required. We look forward to seeing you.

Thursday, 03 March 2011 19:00

Is Sex Addiction Real?

I have seen several articles questioning sex addiction. Is it real?

Recently the media have been questioning the legitimacy of sexual addiction. Is it a real disorder - or just an excuse for "bad boys" to have sex?

Having worked in the field for more than 20 years, I know that sex addiction can kill, both physically and in the emotional/spiritual realm. Sex addiction leaves addicts feeling demoralized; riddled with shame, they experience feelings of despair, loneliness, and isolation. They feel perverted, like social outcasts living a double life of disconnection and disgust.

There are several reasons for the misconceptions surrounding sex addiction. The disorder has yet to be deemed legitimate by The American Psychiatric Association and has yet to find a place in The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. If there is not an official code for a disorder, some professionals deny or question its legitimacy. Clients are often left with misinformation or, even worse, a denial that their behaviors constitute a problem. Many clients come to my office and explain their histories with other therapists: "I told them about what I was doing, and they said it was fine." This can be devastating for clients.  They feel confused, not heard, misunderstood, invalidated. Often they continue their risky behaviors until they meet an even more devastating demise.

We live in a sexually addicted culture, which adds more confusion and denial to the arena of sex addiction. We use sex as a commodity and glorify the objectification of the individual. These practices make it difficult for a culture to embrace the paradigm of sexual disorders.

Like any addiction, sexual addiction meets the criteria for a compulsive and addictive disorder: loss of control, continuance despite negative consequences, a progression in self-destructive behaviors (usually resulting in the need for more intensity and/or danger), and unsuccessful efforts to stop.

We use these criteria, as well as other assessment tools, with our patients at The Meadows. We have been identifying and treating this addiction for 20-some years. Not every person who comes into treatment is ready to address the problem. Treatment can be challenging, painful, and disruptive. But when the client is ready, there are answers, and there is healing. I have had witnessed the courage of many people seeking answers and finding inner healing and peace.

Despite the questioning reports in the media, sex addiction is very real. It is treatable, and people can heal. My hope is that we will see a continual paradigm shift so that those who still suffer will find the support, help, and healing they deserve.

Vicki Tidwell Palmer, LCSW, CSAT will speak at The Meadows Free Lecture Series on Tuesday, March 1, 2011 from 7:00 - 8:30 pm at The Council on Alcohol and Drugs Houston at 303 Jackson Hill in Houston, Texas. The lecture title is "If It's Not One Thing It's Your Mother: How to Move Beyond Blame and Reclaim Your Wholeness." The lecture will explore how our family of origin experiences affect us in profound ways and how, in our adults lives, we seek what is familiar even if it is uncomfortable or worse yet, abusive. Vicki will present key concepts and strategies to begin the process of telling the truth about our childhood and reconnecting with disowned or forgotten parts of the self so that we can reclaim our wholeness. Contact Community Relations Representative Melanie Shelnutt at (713) 702-7784 for more information. No registration required. We look forward to seeing you there.

Helen Kim, CFT, will be speaking at the Garden City, NY on March 2, 2011 at The Ethical Society of Long Island, 38 Old Country Road, Garden City, NY 11530 on Understanding Underearning: Why you do it and how to get over it. "Underearning" isn't a word you'll find in the Oxford English Dictionary, but that doesn't mean people don't do it. In this free workshop learn: Traits of an underearner; The most prevalent ways people avoid earning enough to cover their needs and wants; What motivates people to underearn and Steps you can take to stop earning below your potential. If underearning is costing you, financially, emotionally, spiritually and physically, it really doesn't need to be that way!

No registration required. If you have questions, please contact The Meadows New York Community Relations Representative, Judy Smith at 866-633-5533 or email jsmith@themeadows.com.

Harold D Duncan, PhD, LPC-S, LMFT will be speaking at the Dallas Free Lecture on March 15, 2011 at the Unity Church of Dallas, Sanctuary, 6525 Forest Lane, Dallas, TX 75230 from 7:00-8:30 pm.

The title of the presentation is "Tools for Recovery and Sanity: A Focus on Self-Care."

This presentation focuses on some of the factors that can make us all susceptible to self-destructive thoughts and behavior. In recovery, the acronym is HALT, meaning we are most vulnerable when Hungry, Angry, Lonely and Tired. Emotional burnout does not happen overnight, and here we look at some of the essentials elements in personal and professional self-care. No registration is required. If you have any questions, please contact Dallas Community Relations Representative, Betty Dicken, at 800-892-7799 or bdicken@themeadows.com.

Patty French, MA, LCPC, CADC, CEAP will be speaking at The Meadows Free Lecture on March 16, 2011 at 7:00 pm at The Winnetka Community House in Winnetka, Illinois. Ms. French will discuss Enhancing Recovery through the use of Effective Boundaries. Discover the power of boundaries and how to use them to build and maintain personal well-being, promote healthy relationships, and raise your life to a new level of happiness and contentment. In this lecture, you will gain a better understanding of what boundaries are, why they are important and how to create your own personal boundaries.

Contact Jenna Pastore at 815-641-2185 for more information. No registration required. We look forward to seeing you.

Coming Out of Shame: Issues Faced by the GLBT Population with Arnold Lopez, MSW.

Adrianna Irvine will be speaking at The Meadows Free Lecture on March 29, 2011 at 7:00 pm at The Cadogan Hotel, Knightsbridge in London. Ms. Irvine will discuss A Cross Cultural View on Cross Addiction. The presentation will cover the difference between substance addictions and process addictions, including the more recent findings of the likelihood of cross addiction between both categories. It will also briefly cover dual diagnosis with an in-depth look at some the different fellowships within the 12 step programs. Contact Jenna Pastore at 001 815 6412185 or jpastore@themeadows.com for more information. No registration required. We look forward to seeing you.

Bellevue, Washington, Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Portland, Oregon, Thursday, March 3, 2011
Lust, Anger, Love: Understanding Sexual Compulsivity and the Road to Healthy Intimacy
This lecture will offer a theoretical structure for the treatment of compulsive sexual behaviors. It will explore the roles of sexualized shame and anger as they relate to the cycle of addiction. The ideology of behavioral patterns, including the development of trauma templates, will be discussed, as will the ways this wounding relates to specific sexual behavioral patterns. The lecture also will explore the integration of theoretical approaches, behaviors and specific treatment techniques.

About the Presenter:

Maureen Canning, MA, LMFT, Clinical Consultant for Sexual Disorders at The Meadows and Dakota, has extensive experience working with sexual disorders. She is a past board member of the Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health, as well as past president of the Arizona Council on Sexual Addiction. She facilitated inpatient sexual disorders treatment at The Meadows for a number of years before opening a private practice in Phoenix. Maureen is the author of Lust, Anger, Love: Understanding Sexual Addiction and the Road to Healthy Intimacy.

Learning Objectives
Participants will be able to:

  • Describe the diagnostic criteria for sexual addiction
  • Explore the roles of sexualized anger and shame in the addiction cycle
  • Recognize and discuss trauma templates

Location - Washington
Hilton Bellevue Hotel
300 112th Avenue SE
Bellevue, Washington 98004
425-455-1300
Location - Oregon
Holiday Inn® Portland Airport
8439 NE Columbia Blvd.
Portland, Oregon 97220
503-256-5000
Schedule
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Registration 8:30 a.m. - 9 a.m.
Lecture 9 a.m. - 12 p.m.
Lunch 12 p.m. - 1 p.m. (boxed lunch provided)
Lecture 1 p.m. - 4 p.m.
Cost
$95 per person / $85 online registration
(includes lecture, lunch, materials, hotel parking and 6 continuing education credits)
Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits

March 29, 2011

Adrianna Irvine will be speaking at The Meadows Free Lecture on March 29, 2011 at 7pm at The Cadogan Hotel, Knightsbridge in London. Ms. Irvine will discuss A Cross Cultural View on Cross Addiction. The presentation will cover the difference between substance addictions and process addictions, including the more recent findings of the likelihood of cross addiction between both categories. It will also briefly cover dual diagnosis with an in-depth look at some the different fellowships within the 12 step programs. Contact Jenna Pastore at 001 815 6412185 for more information. No registration required. We look forward to seeing you.

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